Spanda writes: What I have learned so far.
- To see beyond the form & flesh to a
person's inner beauty.
- To understand & experience that
insensitive & even cruel people are like injured
animals or children in pain.
- To hear behind the words spoken and
to know the hidden intention in a person's mind. Often
they did not know their own inner thoughts.
- To feel natural with anyone, because
I was comfortable with myself and this helped them to
- To sense their turmoil before meeting
a person, and to begin to process this in myself in
order to allow the meeting to occur.
- To prepare myself in the quiet times
so as to move quickly when the opportunity to serve
- To remain unassuming and open in the
presence of every person every time, even if we had
- To stay alert to the energy of the moment
and to respond appropriately.
- To bring comfort & to calm a
disturbed person so that they could go to rest and
release their worries.
- To entertain a desperately bored
person by demonstrating the simple joy of living that
they could share.
- To enlighten someone searching for
the mysteries of the universe within themselves,
through breathing and open discussion of the teachings of the Dharma.
- To offer alternative perspectives on
relationships & communication, based on traditional
- To see each individual, in their
state & condition as a reflection of a latent aspect of my own state
& condition. To approach their healing as a component
of my own evolution & healing. To recognize myself, whether from the
past, present or future in each person's behavior and mindset.
- To be a better of example of all that
I know to be, so as not to feel trapped behind my own
- To guide a stranger as my friend
without their feeling subverted in any way. That is to
redefine a person's environment, posture, manners & experience without
exposing any judgment on the original condition as wrong or bad. This
was accomplished through the subtle nature of the corrections
- To present myself in the most neutral
way inside so as to express the reflection of the
desire within each person, as an aspect of myself. Also to tune
into the appearance most suited to each situation & individual as a
compliment to the variation on the personality they sought.
It was important to stay aware that this could change
over time, with the same person.
- To intuit the fantasies & role
playing visualized within the subconscious of a
person, so as to draw them out & to participate in the experimentation
of these impressions. Often to re-enact scenes from
the person's childhood, whether by specific details of people & events
or simply through recreating the emotional tones of a
certain time. Through exploring early conditioning and
allowing the person to accept their own attitudes about themselves &
these events, often deep feelings of guilt could be relieved.
- To distinguish between someone in
need of nurturing and an insatiable hungry ghost on
the path of self-destruction. In other words, I learned to protect people
from themselves, when they had entrusted me to their care.