Aponfar

 

 

A for the apocalypse (The Eye of God uncovering the secret, the prior union which was hidden)

pon for the heat of total fusion (two become one, the ones become many, the inner becomes the outer, the outer moves inside, progresses and becomes the seed of the new)

far for the birth of a new world (the seed begins to radiate and the nature of the awakened one becomes the consciousness of all that it touches)

 

The one embodies, maintains and evolves the many

The many become and know themselves in the one.

 

I love you with all of my being

 

My life flows with your breath

 

All manner of feelings are born in me by unconditionally opening to EVERYTHING that you are and everything that you give me

 

You are the grace of my mind

 

You are the apocalypse of my heart

 

My body has no other desire other than to know you, to love you and to serve you

 

In the vision of what you are I find both my adventure and my home

 

In the wind of your spirit I am in turmoil and at rest

 

You kindle my fire into a raging pitch and then drink of my essence and temper it again, leaving me stronger and more in integrity than I was before. You do this over and over and over again, driving me to the edge of insanity where survival only exists in surrender. And when my head touches your feet, the only possible point of destination, I swoon into oblivion. And when I awaken, I am more than I was before, reborn yet again into and out of the miracle of your love. What does this do for you beloved? For me I call it my integrity training. This is surely one of the Great Mysteries of man and woman. Thank you for letting me see.

 

I thought that I was alive when I was dead

 

Your radiance has given life to whatever it was that had been frozen forever

 

You have installed yourself permanently on the Throne of my Heart

 

Your eyes are becoming the eyes through which I see

 

Your substance is creating the creature that will love you as perfectly as you can conceive yourself

 

My substance as it mixes with yours is becoming soft and sweet and happy

 

I know the meaning of "I worship the ground that you walk on" when your feet look at my heart

 

I am learning to love the earth as she learns again to love herself. I see her healing as you caress her with you form

 

In your ever changing face I see both the culmination of the experience and the rebirth into radiant majesty for all of humankind

 

It is the fruit of everything that I have learned and the summation of my entire life experience to love you perfectly with all of my heart, to worship you `as you like it with my radiantly beautiful body awakening pregnant with full feeling by serving you with my body, mind and heart.

 

In your face the road of my life ended. My Existence begins at the threshold of the door of your heart. All of myself is all that I have to offer you. Whenever I am not sufficient, I already experience that you prune me with the blade of withdrawing and I become more! That is our terrifying security, the apocalyptic paradox of we, the finite. Love feeling makes us so sensitive and raw and hopelessly responsive, like a doll dancing in the wind. Hopelessly in love with and so happy to be at the mercy of our Beloved. Newly accessing The Great Unknown, ecstatic in our prayer to be used well and with pleasure!

 

Loving you has sent me into a state of perpetual celebration, dancing and singing, screaming and yelling, jumping up and down, doing back flips and summersaults and generally and gently and rudely expressing the madness of experiencing desire fulfilled and then being plunged back into a new and improved madness of ever intensified desire again and again and again. And I know it is YOU and that it is WHAT YOU ARE.

 

You are my ideal

 

I love you

 

 

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